Tuesday, March 18, 2014

I'm back!


Well, it's been awhile since I've come on here, but my heart never left. My life has been wonderfully busy and full. We welcomed our third little one to the world over a year ago already. What a little blessing he is, always smiling and giving everyone hugs. 

This past year has been full of learning and adjusting. Seeking to live a more simple life, but simply not sure how to accomplish that goal when I can't seem to get out of the rut of dirty dishes everywhere. 

I have always been overwhelmed by clutter. I remember as a homeschooled kid I would have to clean off my desk before my mind would let me focus on my homework. Now with three busy mess-makers in one small house I felt like I was drowning in stuff everywhere I went. My stress level was rising and that only made me lash out at our beautiful kids. 

A breath of fresh air came after a conversation with a good friend and 10 minutes of sitting in the sun on our porch step with a bowl of ice cream for the first time this year. 

I poured out my heart to God through my pen and my notebook and He graciously answered me by speaking to my heart. "You're focusing on the wrong thing," He said. I realized that in my good intentions to live a simple life so I could spend more intentional time loving my family and serving others I had completely forgotten about the ones I was doing it for. I saw that instead of focusing on that pile of laundry that just wouldn't fold itself or those doll clothes that never stayed in their clothes trunk I needed to shift my focus to Jesus. 

Jesus lived an amazing example of a simple life, always putting others first and loving every person He came in contact with, and while I can't realistically follow His example of not even having a place to lay His head (nor do I want to), I can learn to live a more simple life by seeking to become more like Him.

So my goal has shifted a little. I long for a simple, clutter-free home, but my real goal is to know Jesus more, and to pour my love into the family He has given me. And in reality a simple life is not a goal to be accomplished but a journey full of little decisions along the way. I don't want my children to think of me as a crazy mom who only cares about getting things done, but as a real mom who loves Jesus and loves others and hopefully learns the secret to keeping up with laundry along the way. 

Our 3 yr old's solution to finding his jeans :)